Category Archives: Poetry

Rescue Me – Suicide Poem from Carterton

I sit waiting at the crossing
Thinking
About all the different ways
That train could end me
On this autumn day

A wise owl interjects
Stops, looks, acknowledges
Speaks
These dark thoughts are not all of you
This is why you need to keep fighting
Fighting for your rights
And the rights of others
Fighting for professional care

Beyond my body
A man on a bike calls to me
I open my window
We chat as neighbours

I like distraction

The thoughts of destruction weaken
Then grow stronger
It takes huge strength and concentration
To drive that devil back to hell
Secretly before the stranger

Please my people, rescue me
From the fires of hell
From their torture wheel

enD

Written in Carterton New Zealand, the heart of the Wairarapa Council marketing says - proof that the heart of our country is cruel immoral and uncivilized, there was no need to put me in this situation – no need to put any human being in this situation.  I had been begging for care I was entitled to and continually refused.

Lots of Christians go on about God saving you, but its the God in other people that rescue the traumatised and hurt - we have lost that in this country after 30 years of corruption and globalist terrorism advancing rich and persecuting poor.  People like me are nothing more than a way to create jobs and earn income for drug companies – they don’t want people to heal, they want people to be dysfunctional.  Evil shit but after 14 years of study it is the only explanation I can come up with.  I am repeatedly reminded of the presentation by KPMG consultant several years ago that said NGOs running mental health services DOES NOT WORK, its something they tried 20 years ago in UK it failed miserably, when they assessed why it was found the NGOs only took on those clients that were easy and cost them the least – the difficult ones they rejected.

The scary thing of course is most in the community cannot accept something like that would go on in our ‘beautiful’ paradise, yet I know in my heart it is true and that is a crime under law.

It took weeks to get over this event and I know if I didn’t write this poem those feelings would still be overwhelming me.  So I encourage people to try it and see what comes out, then share.  I am best contacted on facebook /jrmurphypoetmusician or twitter @jrmurphypoetry.

These are words from my first ever ‘dark’ poem I Want To Come In From The Cold

For I am Love, I am Life, I am Light
As much as I am Hate, I am Death, I am Darkness
A whole being
No longer shielded from the reality of the hatred at the heart of our now materialistic Kiwi culture.

Kia kaha to us all

JR

$1 Bread

Got no coffee
Got no tea
$1 bread is all I see

Got no car
I’m not free
$1 bread is all I see

Got no band
Backing me
$1 bread is all I see

Got no respect
That I need
$1 bread is all I see

Got no care
Cause of ACC
$1 bread is all I see

Got no money
To be me
$1 bread is all I see

While I got no justice
All would agree
$1 bread is all I’ll see

enD

No Respect

Written after police visit at 11pm 22 November 2015

Police have really got to stop all this shit
The visits, feigned concern, discrimination, ALL OF IT!

All reports I read say they’re supposed to protect
But for my welfare, my dignity, my peace, NO RESPECT!

The Ombudsman doesn’t want to hear what I see
So sends round the police to SCARE THE HELL INTO ME!

enD

Driven To Despair

You’ve driven me to swear
Driven me and others to despair
You allowed the govt to not care
Torture degrade, create hate and fear

You’ve driven me to hate
Left me writhing at hell’s gate
Told me there I must wait
Want heaven’s door to be my fate

You’ve driven me insane
In your class war fucking game
They do the wrong, I take the blame
You’re heads you should hang in shame

You’ve driven me to drink
To numb the pain so I don’t think
About right-wing policies that truly stink
And their increasing NAZI link

You’ve driven me to yell
Denied the facts, why I’m not well
Burn here in the fires of hell
Fuelled by corruption of what I tell

You’ve driven me to scream
Give up my lifelong hopes and dream
I want to die you are so mean
Keep asking where my health care been

enD

Help Me Minister

Mr Smith, Honourable Minister
Mr Smith, with ideas sinister

You expect your workers to deliver
Shit balls rolled in cabinet rooms
You expect your workers to deliver
A service that breaks all rules

Instead help me Mr Smith
Help me Minister, help me Nick

Because a damaged man he raped me
Every way he could
A damaged man he raped me
Because he knew he could

Help me justice system
Help me lawyers, help me chief

I’ve been asking for care and justice
Every way I could
I’ve been asking for care and justice
Because I knew I could

Help me health providers
Help me professionals, help me guiders
The injury of abuse
Treatment and neglect’s unfair
The injury of abuse
Should follow models of health care

Help me please my people
Help me beat it, help me heal

They took from me those ones
Those that understand
They took from me support
That steady guiding hand

Help me Mr Key, Prime Minister, help me please

enD

Human Sewage

A minor & G, song

I am human sewage, the DHB decided so
Bob Francis said do nothing, pretend we don’t know

I am human sewage, ACC decided so
Nick Smith said lets do nothing, keep up this torture show

I am human sewage, the commissioners decided so
The Ombudsman said do nothing, we don’t wanna know what you know

I am human sewage, the government decided so
John Key said lets do nothing, keep up this hypocrite show

I am human sewage, our MPs decided so
When they all said “We can’t do nothin, go away we don’t wanny know”

I am human sewage, mental health decided so
In the Wairarapa are ignorant bigots, running a suicide show

Turning me to human sewage, standing here just so
A witness to the lies they’re telling, cause they’re cruel & I know

I am human sewage, many people decided so
When they all stood back and did nothing, that’s why I’m here on show

Singing we have human sewage, created some years ago
When neo-liberals took over this country & a right-wing agenda took hold

Aye aye aye aye aye
Aye aye aye aye aye aye
Aye aye aye aye aye
Aye aye aye aye aye aye

enD

Beat Me Black With Blue

The knives they are out
And there is no doubt
The bigots just want me shut down

Use their unbridled power
From their ivory tower
To persecute degrade & hound

I know what’s right
How to fight the god fight
On the benches, in the streets, under ground

Its a part of our law
That you choose to ignore
Let ACC break legislation I’ve found

It’s unlawful what they do
Beat me black with blue
On their torture wheel going round & round

You don’t like what I say
That I hope & I pray
For the highways of hell you’re all bound

enD

Farewell to Saffy dog, we’ll never forget you

We just scattered Saffy’s ashes at the dog park in Carterton and the end of Jellicoe Street in Greytown where she grew up.  Recited this poem I found in a book I read when I first got her as a puppy, because didn’t know about dogs then – she taught me so much, she loved us so much, she looked out for us and protected us for 14 years.

DOG MY FRIEND

When God had made the earth and stars
The flowers and the trees
He then made all the animals
And all the birds and bees

And when his work was finished
Not one was quite the same
He said, “I’ll walk this earth of mine
and give each one a name.”

So he travelled land and sea
And everywhere he went
A little creature followed him
Until its strength was spent

When all were named upon the earth
And in the sky and sea
The little creature said. “Dear Lord
there’s not one left for me.”

The Father smiled and softly said.
“I’ve left you till the end,
I’ve turned my own name back to front
and called you dog my friend.”

Anon

Knockin on Heaven’s Door – poem from the darklands

Sittin here listening to Eric
In my battered old 50s rockin chair
My discman gives it to me just how I like it
Loud and surround in my ear

Off in the distance past the neighbours
The poplars whisper the winds symphony
As spirit blows cross the papa
There’s a storm brewin, sweepin up country

Eric’s started blowing harp in my head
And knockin on the door of the dead
Trying to keep it together, through this killer storm weather
A battle that fills me with dread

The CDs now on Guns N Roses
As the evening air touches my skin
And the cloud’s rolling in from the west
Like a woollen cloak being pulled cross the heavens

Now Axle starts knockin on the door
As only he knows how to do
He sings it, I live it
Trying that door to break through

Oh God when are they gunna listen
Their ears are so closed to our pain
The voice of those traumatised and poor
Writhing in pain, writhing in pain

The light is starting to fade……

Knock knock knockin on heaven’s door
Knock knock knockin on heaven’s door
Knock knock knockin on heaven’s door

enD

Lawless Mongrels

Lawless mongrels in the studio
Lawless mongrels in a suit
Lawless mongrels talking bullshit
No matter who gets hurt

Lawless mongrels running countries
Lawless mongrels our MPs
Lawless mongrels in the media
Paper, radio and TVs

Lawless mongrels in the boardroom
Lawless mongrels up the street
Lawless mongrels in our government
Demonising poor beneath their feet

Lawless mongrels are those with power
Lawless mongrels with cash the ones
Lawless mongrels aren’t those out here
Our cruel society now shuns

enD