Arrived at Victoria University for the event, people from Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Trade organising it. Was desperate to find someone I could talk to about getting protection from police as a Civil Society Actor. Started talkng to this woman Sally, was upset, she told me she had been involved in human rights sector for years. I challenged her that it was people like her who had caused the human rights issues we now had, that I now had.
She became very passive aggressive to the point of creepy, they bought me a young woman from Human Rights Commission & I immediately moved away from her like I was frightened – I can’t help it, its a reaction to all the times they have not helped me & hurt me – after all those years begging for their help and being discredited, ignored and having police etc attack me for it.
I wasn’t in a good place so I couldn’t talk to them – there’s no point – I know there is no point after 15 years. Only place I am ever going to get help is the United Nations, HRC are set up to protect the government and New Zealand’s reputation – they even say that in their promotion of the event. They say they trying to protect NZs reputation BLATANTLY – groan.
Sally & another woman couldn’t/woudn’t believe what has been happening with police, mental health, ACC and the justice system. When I said about throwing the paint on White Ribbon banner in police station and chalking swastika on building Sally became really weird. Apparently NOBODY is allowed to use that symbol etc etc, (she also called me Sweetie one part of it). I asked her if she knew how the HUman Rights Act came about, she said she did. When I my use of that symbol was to represent gross violations of my rights and I had every right to use it, she kept saying I wasn’t – so did the young HRC woman. I tried to explain about people being driven to self-harm, violence, addiction suicide etc due to human rights violations by our government – she didn’t want to know. NAZIs did it to people, in 21st century govt has worked out how to drive people to doing it themselves. NZ has highest rate of woman self-harming in the world.
I told her she was trivialising and discrediting what was happening to me and 10,000s of other mentally injured abuse victims with her ‘extreme’ reaction to me using the swastika. She said she wasn’t -but she was. She was incredibly patronising and behaving really oddly, other people came around. I knew it was time to end the conversation when people start reacting like that. So I headed into the lecture theatre to sit down, a very dark skinned woman with braids had been listening and tried to stop me, she asked the man standing near the door to stop me from entering. I wasn’t having any of that so just went around him, while he was trying to work out why I would be stopped. Lots of practice & a complete lack of respect for govt officials gives you the strength to ignore them.
I also told Sally I was human sewage and she kept telling me I wasn’t, over and over again. I said I wasn’t asking her opinion on it, I knew how I was being treated, I was a poet and song-writer and had written a song about it, I knew I was human sewage. Her reaction was very strange.
I got in the meeting – about 50 people – mostly from agencies WHO HAVE BEEN CAUSING THESE HUMAN RIGHTS ISSUES – groan. I had begged for help from EVERY ONE OF THEM and been told they don’t deal with individual cases – question is how do they represent human rights violations if they refuse to talk to the people having their rights violated. Some of them loved the sound of their own voices. The people running it were middle class ignorant people, obviously doing very well pretending we have human rights in New Zealand and staying ignorant to what is really happening.
By this stage the organisers were in a flap, outside, Sally came in and proceeded to tell me I had to leave – I looked at her and said NO. Yes apparently I had to leave by order of Victoria University Security because I was trespassed. WTF – I was shocked, don’t remember being given a trespass order by them, even though did have an altercation with security during a chalk protest outside couple of years ago. Police were called, but nothing came of it.
So spoke up in front of everybody and told them what was happening, started crying, told the room of people they were trying to have me removed, that I just wanted to stay – it was related to my LEGAL non-violent protests and I needed to stay to find out what to do to get protection and justice. I asked them to back me up, only 2 people did, the organiser up the front went out and had a talk to security, came back in and whispered I could stay. They don’t realise there would have been NO WAY they would have got me out of there without police arresting me – NO WAY.
What a way to start the consultation meeting – with such a blatant violation of my human and civil rights. Sally came back in the room and tried to sit beside me – I asked her to go away several times, she refused. She moved a few seats away from me, but came closer at one point – she was making me feel really uncomfortable and was even turned towards me. I just tried to ignore her. Why would someone sit beside you, when you obviously didn’t like them or want them there – it was really really creepy & I will be making a complaint about her inappropriate behaviour. An ex-social worker – groan, some of those people are very mentally disturbed – passive aggressive & DO NOT like being challenged – they just want people saying nice things about them.
We went around the room with microphone, most people were talking about violations of human rights against mentally ill people – but from an advocacy perspective. Got to me and I did it from my perspective.
Took some notes, supported people when they said things I know to be true – groaned, closed my eyes and shook my head when I heard BULLSHIT from people who had no idea what they were talking about.
Talked to a couple of people afterwards about what going on with police, everything they suggested I had tried. They were shocked at what was going on – because obviously they don’t come into contact with people like me – but I had phoned every one of those organisations (eg Amnesty & UN NZ group and been told to go away, they didn’t want to know about individual cases. Not the exact person I was speaking to, but others.)
Left & went to Parliament was upset about what had happened – they had actually tried to have me removed from that very important meeting on how to approach United Nations about human rights abuses I was being subjected to. WTF. And that woman Sally had acted really strangely – I’m sure a psychitarist would be able to explain her disturbing behaviour, especially about sitting next to me when I asked her not to – what was that?
At parliament I sat there mostly just crying & upset in front of my signs, my biggest sign was WORTHELESS SUICIDAL ABUSE VICTIM, PLEASE KILL ME – that’s how I felt. A nice couple of tourists came up to me and asked why there was so much suicide in New Zealand. So I told them why, was thinking later how I should do a VLOG about it. They completely understood about how NZers were so looked after by their government but after neo-liberalism they were terrorised by them.
I asked their nationality as I couldn’t pick it – the were Isralie – there was another person their listening as well – an American, she agreed with everything I was saying about neo-liberalism government etc – was ashamed of Trump. I said how I didn’t really understand the conflicts in their region and was focused on my own country, didn’t believe it was anything really to do with me on the other side of the world. I did say I knew they had serious issues of allocation of resources like water and places to grow food, which I am sure was fuelling their problems.
As we talked it was apparent in New Zealand the poorest are denied a safe place to live and access to land required to grow food. They have welfare & homes for disabled in Israel – so does New Zealand, but I said how they had taken many away and even though they gave you just enough to live, rents were skyrocketing and payments weren’t. I also commented that even though there was welfare you were degraded & hated in teh community when you had to rely on it. Even your own family were ashamed of you.
An Indian man from MSD (sounded like a senior executive the way he was talking) came along, he was nice and wanted to get me help. First thing he asked me is if it was MSD who were not helping me. I assured him my WINZ case manager was one of my biggest support people, she was an amazing person and was often upset she couldn’t get me ACC care and mental health services I was entitled to. He was relieved – he checked about three more times, he was nice & went into Parliament to try and get me to see an MP – once he heard how serious my situation was. He never came back, I told him they wouldnt’ see me, they were all scared of me but he could try if he wanted to. I told them I was in contact with them and nothing had changed.
Then DAVE came over – Dave is one of the older security guards I DO NOT LIKE after a couple of incidents which were grossly unfair. Apparently people had been in to complain to security about me and several had called police – WTF – what he said came across as a threat – hell it is a threat, but that’s the abusive process at the moment – that’s what all those people in suicide prevention have done – turned suicidal people into CRIINALS. I know how to get out of having police or mental health called, there no way they going to commit me in a million years.
Had a long talk with Dave, so we sort of reconciled our differences, although I cried several times and said how traumatised I was by the things he had done. He never apologised of course. He agreed with most of what I was saying, he also said staff had been pretty traumatised by the man who set himself alight on the lawn.
At one point there was a cameraman setting up for someone I didn’t recognised, obviously to do with a news programme of some sort. Maybe it was about the court case of woman helping her mum suicide and my sign sort of related to that. I know he set up so I was in teh background, but I couldn’t bare to watch TV news tonight after they went on and on about National party leadership.
Left about 3.30pm and headed home. I have protested 100s of times now, EVERY time I go out always learn something & always meet some really interesting people. Usually learn something about how bad the system is as well – but today was the weirdest. Those MFAT people are completely radicalised, they truly believe people are getting what the government and laws say they are. Thank God all our submissions will go to the United Nations, I’ll make one to MFAT by 21st June 2018, but I know they will ignore it – as they ignore all my submissions on human rights etc.
What a day – I want to encourage people with human rights and other injustice issues TO BE IDLE NO MORE – GET OUT IN THE WORLD, OUT IN THE STREET, it is essential if we want things to change.
Kia kaha & Aroha to us all.