Monthly Archives: February 2018

Why is there graffiti about police violence against women in Wairarapa

Someone I don’t know that well told me about some chalking in Masterton about police violence towards women and I told her it was me.  Then I told her what happened and why I had done it, so even though I have mentioned it before on this website I will tell you again.  I also want those who are interested in what happened to me to know local media have REFUSED to say anything about it and have censored what has happened for years.

I did that graffiti in CHALK PEN on vacant shops in Masterton because a police officer violently assaulted me for a non-violent protest about discrimination and injustices I am being subjected to for asking for the professional health care i am entitled to under ACC and mental health services.

I have protested about the issues of professional health care for mentally injured abuse victims for many years.  Since I was raped, couldn’t get the help I knew I desperately needed and read the ACC legislation and other health, disability and human rights laws.

In all the times I have been arrested up until July 2016 I HAD NEVER BEEN ASSAULTED AND THREATENED – yes police might have been a bit rough with me and nasty ones could be mean – but NOTHING LIKE WHAT HAPPENED OUTSIDE CARTERTON POLICE STATION.  That was a full on violent assault and the next 3 hours with police was horrendous, I am still traumatised thinking about it.

So police assaulted me, I have medical evidence and CCTV footage to prove it that never made it to court because it was bought up during my charges for wilful trespass (which I won) and graffiti (which I was convicted of).  I am appealing this conviction.

I complained about the assault to police the next day and to IPCA soon afer, I was told they would deal with it after my case went to court for the graffiti protest and other wilful trespass charges for other NON-VIOLENT protests.  I was using art I had done in retaliation for police working for ACC in charging me with MISUSE OF A TELEPHONE FOR PHONING THEM SCREAMING TO HAVE MY CARE REINSTATED from 2009 – I had won two reviews and was very unwell.

I was never told until the court case came up – which took 18 mths & three times in court to even hear, our court system is sooooooooo bad – that the assault complaint would be dealt with there.  How could they do this, I had assaumed a case of assault would be done separately and investigated thoughly – IT IS NOT!  So the officers lied in court, the judge believed them and not my lawyer or me – he crust old judge and one of those judges who had been dragged in to try and cope with our GROSSLY OVERSTRETCHED, TO THE POINT OF ILLEGAL, court system our govt had created.

So the judge found the two officers justified in their assault – their version of the assault and what happened – not the truth.

I was so angry and so upset – if they could get away with assaulting me like that, then it would only get worse if I kept protesting.  ONe of the officers told me that, he said if I kept doing it I WOULD SEE HOW BAD POLICE COULD BE – I am passionate about my activism over abusive mental health care, I know what I do is important and if I could get professional care applied to me and other abuse victims I could save so much unnecessary suffering, violence, addiction and suicide.  It is illegal to terrorise an Civil Society Activists like me in New Zealand – in any commonwealth country – in any country that belongs to the United Nations.  I know my rights very well.

I stewed on it for a couple of months then knew I had to do something as my mental health was getting even worse.  When all the news came out about Harvey Weinstein sexually abusing women and the latest thing with Russell McVeagh lawyers I felt empowered enough to carry out my plan – terrified as I was of being assaulted even worse by Wairarapa police.

My plan was to destroy or make police take down the White Ribbon banner encouraging women to speak out about violence by men in their foyer – the foyer I had sat in extremely traumatised rocking backwards and forwards begging to go home – where every person who came past I recoiled from, especially the officer who had threatened me – after they had violently assaulted degraded and discriminated against me.

So I came up with throwning red paint over it as the easiest way – and it was.  So I went there, threw red paint on the banner, left a piece of my art on the counter and left the building, nobody had come out so used my can of white chalk spray and did a swastika on end of it.  Left there and headed for Lower Hutt where I chalked Judge JP Butler and swastika on teh building and then went to Wellington police station where I handed myself in.

The Wellington police were so nice, they were not very impressed with what I was telling them about the assault and what had happened through the courts etc.  I told them Wellington police had NEVER hurt me like that and I knew what those two officers had done was illegal.  They made me talk about it though and I hadn’t realised they would do that – it still makes me really unwell upset and traumatised and I’ve never been able to talk to a mental health professional about it – because ACC and mental health are still refusing me services.

i do the chalking on the buildings in my community to be heard – because local and national media refuse to tell my story, refuse to say what is happening to me and why.  I don’t understand why they are covering up what is happening to a person who is a NON- VIOLENT and challenging protester – protesting about mental health services for abuse victims etc.

So that is most of the story from the person who chalked about police violence – that is the truth, there is more to it after years of protesting and being harmed, refer to rest of my website if you want to know and of course my poetry – that says it in an even more real and feeling way.

Leaders of New Zealand and those who uphold law and justice are a huge disappointment.  They say one thing and do exactly the opposite then use media to cover it up or trivialise what is going on.

New Zealand used to be such a cool place – I know it was never perfect – but what is happening now is grossly immoral, corrupt and violates even our own terrorism laws, it violates laws against psychological torture as well and of course human rights and other laws. And the most disturbing thing is those organisations like Health & Disability commission, Human Rights Commission and Ombudsman ARE THE WORST OFFENDERS!!!!!!!!

🙁  And I said I didn’t want to cry but how can I not – every National party voter wanted this, and every Labour party voter condoned it in their party as well.  They created this environment of dog eat dog and created proverty then hurt the poor until we can make money out of them through psychotropic drugs, justice industry and even social services/psychology industry.  They did all this to replace the jobs in manufacturing OUR OWN GOVERNMENT drove out of New Zealand since the 1980s.

Kia kaha and aroha to us all.

My Lifes in Boxes

My life’s in boxes little pieces
A wreckage on these hostile beaches
On TV paper radio
No-one says the things I know

The gods of war fight kiwi poor
PR stands guard at every door
They numb the masses to the harm they cause
Tell me and others ‘the fault’s all yours’

Someone made a big mistake
Gave power and glory to those who take
Its social problems they created
Loved the rich & poor they hated

Our leaders ears are painted on
Responsibility they run from
Focus on what’s bright and new
Degrade, despise, reject the few

And those who call the good to action
Are considered some sort of loony faction
Where have this country’s morals gone
Protect the weak, curtail the strong

enD

Seamus Boyer Blow Fly Editor Wairarapa News condoning violence against women

I’m really upset about my situation at the moment, WINZ threatening to cut my disability benefit because I can’t see a doctor because I can’t get any mental health services to help me.  I’ve been on invalids for years and still I am forced to go through this nightmare year after year – at the same time as ACC and MH refusing me professional health care I am entitled to by law.  As well as being unable to get a lawyer to force them to do what the law says and get the police to stop terrorising me for legally protesting about this gross injustice.

So I went chalking today on windows of empty shops around Masterton – I then phoned Wairarapa News to tell them what I had done.  I got Seamus Boyer and his behaviour was really really strange, really derogatory, patronising and really strange.  A classic example of this GASLIGHTING behaviour of people in abusive power relationships.

So I called, said who I was, said I had been chalking about police violence and suicide – just so he knew and could report it.  So he launched into speaking over me, saying we’ve talked about this Jayne, (which we havn’t – he’s talked about it but he wouldn’t listen to anything I said or what was happening to me).  I don’t intend to say anything about what you are doing, you’re not listening Jayne, I don’t intend to change my mind.

When I said but we havn’t talked about anything, he repeats we’ve talked about this, I’m ending this call, I’m not interested in anything you have to say Jayne.  Really really creepy.  HE doesn’t know anything about me, he has never talked to me about any of this, except to disagree with anything I have told him about what is happening in Wairarapa.  He is a classic example of a radicalised person, just like Germans were like prior to WWII, listening to everything those in power were saying and in complete denial about the suffering and harm they were inflicting against vulnerable minority groups.

Sadly I lost it & swore at him before he hung up – I am devastated and distraught because it is yet more confirmation of how red-neck and right-wing extremist Wairarapa news media are.  That is why we are No 1 for suicide in this region, no 1 for compulstory treatment orders, No 1 for use of psychotropic drugs on disabled people, No 1 for homelessness (most disabled poor been driven from this region already).  It is a mass psychosis with these people in power – exactly what happens in abusive power relationships – classic GASLIGHTING of women.

Seamus Boyer IS RESPONSIBLE for the suffering and suicides of dozens of Wairarapa people, because he covers up the gross miscarriage of justice happening to me and so many disabled poor people in this region.  It is deeply disturbing just how creepy these people are.  So don’t believe anything you see in Wairarapa News – or Times Age, they are even more OLD BOYS NETWORK.

He doesn’t want to know what has happened to me at the hands of police, ACC, mental health and my community because he can’t live in denial if he hears what is going on.  He doesn’t want to know what I do as a Civil Society actor, making submissions to Select Committees and United Nations Human Rights committees.

Some serious KARMA coming to that man and all those he protects. ewwwwww

NZ Human Rights Universal Periodic Review Consultation Wellington

Arrived at Victoria University for the event, people from Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Trade organising it.  Was desperate to find someone I could talk to about getting protection from police as a Civil Society Actor.   Started talkng to this woman Sally, was upset, she told me she had been involved in human rights sector for years.  I challenged her that it was people like her who had caused the human rights issues we now had, that I now had.

She became very passive aggressive to the point of creepy, they bought me a young woman from Human Rights Commission & I immediately moved away from her like I was frightened – I can’t help it, its a reaction to all the times they have not helped me & hurt me – after all those years begging for their help and being discredited, ignored and having police etc attack me for it.

I wasn’t in a good place so I couldn’t talk to them – there’s no point – I know there is no point after 15 years.  Only place I am ever going to get help is the United Nations, HRC are set up to protect the government and New Zealand’s reputation – they even say that in their promotion of the event.  They say they trying to protect NZs reputation BLATANTLY – groan.

Sally & another woman couldn’t/woudn’t believe what has been happening with police, mental health, ACC and the justice system.  When I said about throwing the paint on White Ribbon banner in police station and chalking swastika on building Sally became really weird.  Apparently NOBODY is allowed to use that symbol etc etc, (she also called me Sweetie one part of it).  I asked her if she knew how the HUman Rights Act came about, she said she did.  When I my use of that symbol was to represent gross violations of my rights and I had every right to use it, she kept saying I wasn’t – so did the young HRC woman.   I tried to explain about people being driven to self-harm, violence, addiction suicide etc due to human rights violations by our government – she didn’t want to know.  NAZIs did it to people, in 21st century govt has worked out how to drive people to doing it themselves.  NZ has highest rate of woman self-harming in the world.

I told her she was trivialising and discrediting what was happening to me and 10,000s of other mentally injured abuse victims with her ‘extreme’ reaction to me using the swastika.  She said she wasn’t -but she was.  She was incredibly patronising and behaving really oddly, other people came around.  I knew it was time to end the conversation when people start reacting like that.  So I headed into the lecture theatre to sit down, a very dark skinned woman with braids had been listening and tried to stop me, she asked the man standing near the door to stop me from entering.  I wasn’t having any of that so just went around him, while he was trying to work out why I would be stopped.  Lots of practice & a complete lack of respect for govt officials gives you the strength to ignore them.

I also told Sally I was human sewage and she kept telling me I wasn’t, over and over again.  I said I wasn’t asking her opinion on it, I knew how I was being treated, I was a poet and song-writer and had written a song about it, I knew I was human sewage.  Her reaction was very strange.

I got in the meeting – about 50 people – mostly from agencies WHO HAVE BEEN CAUSING THESE HUMAN RIGHTS ISSUES – groan.  I had begged for help from EVERY ONE OF THEM and been told they don’t deal with individual cases – question is how do they represent human rights violations if they refuse to talk to the people having their rights violated.  Some of them loved the sound of their own voices.  The people running it were middle class ignorant people, obviously doing very well pretending we have human rights in New Zealand and staying ignorant to what is really happening.

By this stage the organisers were in a flap, outside, Sally came in and proceeded to tell me I had to leave – I looked at her and said NO.  Yes apparently I had to leave by order of Victoria University Security because I was trespassed.  WTF – I was shocked, don’t remember being given a trespass order by them, even though did have an altercation with security during a chalk protest outside couple of years ago.  Police were called, but nothing came of it.

So spoke up in front of everybody and told them what was happening, started crying, told the room of people they were trying to have me removed, that I just wanted to stay – it was related to my LEGAL non-violent protests and I needed to stay to find out what to do to get protection and justice.  I asked them to back me up, only 2 people did, the organiser up the front went out and had a talk to security, came back in and whispered I could stay.  They don’t realise there would have been NO WAY they would have got me out of there without police arresting me – NO WAY.

What a way to start the consultation meeting – with such a blatant violation of my human and civil rights.  Sally came back in the room and tried to sit beside me – I asked her to go away several times, she refused.  She moved a few seats away from me, but came closer at one point – she was making me feel really uncomfortable and was even turned towards me.  I just tried to ignore her.  Why would someone sit beside you, when you obviously didn’t like them or want them there – it was really really creepy & I will be making a complaint about her inappropriate behaviour.  An ex-social worker – groan, some of those people are very mentally disturbed – passive aggressive & DO NOT like being challenged – they just want people saying nice things about them.

We went around the room with microphone, most people were talking about violations of human rights against mentally ill people – but from an advocacy perspective.  Got to me and I did it from my perspective.

Took some notes, supported people when they said things I know to be true – groaned, closed my eyes and shook my head when I heard BULLSHIT from people who had no idea what they were talking about.

Talked to a couple of people afterwards about what going on with police, everything they suggested I had tried.  They were shocked at what was going on – because obviously they don’t come into contact with people like me – but I had phoned every one of those organisations (eg Amnesty & UN NZ group and been told to go away, they didn’t want to know about individual cases.  Not the exact person I was speaking to, but others.)

Left & went to Parliament was upset about what had happened – they had actually tried to have me removed from that very important meeting on how to approach United Nations about human rights abuses I was being subjected to. WTF.  And that woman Sally had acted really strangely – I’m sure a psychitarist would be able to explain her disturbing behaviour, especially about sitting next to me when I asked her not to – what was that?

At parliament I sat there mostly just crying & upset in front of my signs, my biggest sign was WORTHELESS SUICIDAL ABUSE VICTIM, PLEASE KILL ME – that’s how I felt.  A nice couple of tourists came up to me and asked why there was so much suicide in New Zealand.  So I told them why, was thinking later how I should do a VLOG about it.  They completely understood about how NZers were so looked after by their government but after neo-liberalism they were terrorised by them.

I asked their nationality as I couldn’t pick it – the were Isralie – there was another person their listening as well – an American, she agreed with everything I was saying about neo-liberalism government etc – was ashamed of Trump.  I said how I didn’t really understand the conflicts in their region and was focused on my own country, didn’t believe it was anything really to do with me on the other side of the world.  I did say I knew they had serious issues of allocation of resources like water and places to grow food, which I am sure was fuelling their problems.

As we talked it was apparent in New Zealand the poorest are denied a safe place to live and access to land required to grow food.  They have welfare & homes for disabled in Israel – so does New Zealand, but I said how they had taken many away and even though they gave you just enough to live, rents were skyrocketing and payments weren’t.  I also commented that even though there was welfare you were degraded & hated in teh community when you had to rely on it.  Even your own family were ashamed of you.

An Indian man from MSD (sounded like a senior executive the way he was talking) came along, he was nice and wanted to get me help.  First thing he asked me is if it was MSD who were not helping me.  I assured him my WINZ case manager was one of my biggest support people, she was an amazing person and was often upset she couldn’t get me ACC care and mental health services I was entitled to.  He was relieved – he checked about three more times, he was nice & went into Parliament to try and get me to see an MP – once he heard how serious my situation was.  He never came back, I told him they wouldnt’ see me, they were all scared of me but he could try if he wanted to.  I told them I was in contact with them and nothing had changed.

Then DAVE came over – Dave is one of the older security guards I DO NOT LIKE after a couple of incidents which were grossly unfair.   Apparently people had been in to complain to security about me and several had called police – WTF – what he said came across as a threat – hell it is a threat, but that’s the abusive process at the moment – that’s what all those people in suicide prevention have done – turned suicidal people into CRIINALS.  I know how to get out of having police or mental health called, there no way they going to commit me in a million years.

Had a long talk with Dave, so we sort of reconciled our differences, although I cried several times and said how traumatised I was by the things he had done.  He never apologised of course.  He agreed with most of what I was saying, he also said staff had been pretty traumatised by the man who set himself alight on the lawn.

At one point there was a cameraman setting up for someone I didn’t recognised, obviously to do with a news programme of some sort.  Maybe it was about the court case of woman helping her mum suicide and my sign sort of related to that.  I know he set up so I was in teh background, but I couldn’t bare to watch TV news tonight after they went on and on about National party leadership.

Left about 3.30pm and headed home.  I have protested 100s of times now, EVERY time I go out always learn something & always meet some really interesting people.  Usually learn something about how bad the system is as well – but today was the weirdest.  Those MFAT people are completely radicalised, they truly believe people are getting what the government and laws say they are.  Thank God all our submissions will go to the United Nations, I’ll make one to MFAT by 21st June 2018, but I know they will ignore it – as they ignore all my submissions on human rights etc.

What a day – I want to encourage people with human rights and other injustice issues TO BE IDLE NO MORE – GET OUT IN THE WORLD, OUT IN THE STREET, it is essential if we want things to change.

Kia kaha & Aroha to us all.

 

 

 

Psychological abuse – GASLIGHTING – by Wairarapa police New Zealand

9 February 2018

 

Peter Jackson &

David Rutherford

Human Rights Commission

PO Box 12411

Thorndon

WELLINGTON

 

(NOTE: this letter was also emailed to Secretary for Justice Andrew Bridgman, Jacinda Ardern PM, Andrew Little Minister for Justice, Stuart Nash Minister for Police, Kieran McNaulty MP, Ron Mark MP, Jan Logie, Mojo Mathes, Carterton Mayor John Booth & Lynn Patterson Masterton Mayor, Wairarapa Times Age and Wairarapa News)

Dear Sirs

This letter is to multiple people, not just those on the address above, I can only write this once. I beg for help so often and am completely discredited, degraded & criminally neglected for telling the truth about what is happening to me (and many other people I am sure).

I refer to the letter 12013 and the absolutely insulting patronising response about Disabled people purposely left to rot on welfare because of gross miscarriage of justice currently perpetrated by our cruel immoral and corruption neo-liberal controlled government and justice agencies. The three arms of government all being grossly corrupted by this economic movement now being called a terrorist religion.

You are talking about improving employment outcomes for disabled people like myself, when I am being illegally denied professional treatment care rehabilitation and a safe home to live in by ACC. If I received the assistance I am entitled to I would be able to return to work.  Along with being terrorised by police and others for asking for the health care and justice I know I am entitled to under law – especially Human Rights laws that you are supposed to uphold.

The treatment of disabled people being denied the right to work has nothing to do with societal attitudes it is purely economic and relates to the attitude of our corrupt immoral cruel leaders – it is nothing to do with society – they don’t even know what is going on. They teach discrimination of less than 100% productive workers at university – any person who does an economics paper as part of their degree will be taught to get the maximum productivity out of staff. The ideas of running an advertising campaign to ‘brainwash’ (which is illegal under Bill of Rights & Human Rights) society to be nice to disabled people is deeply flawed & deeply disturbing.

The discrimination I face almost daily for not working has been ingrained in people for 30 years since neo-liberals drove jobs overseas & impoverished 100,000s New Zealanders purposely – then blamed them for their situation – especially disabled people. I face this discrimination, not only in my community but mostly from mental health services, politicians, police, lawyers, justice services and your organisation. You know that because you know who I am and why I protest against you – why I put up pieces of art with swastika’s on in your office – because you are leading the persecution of disabled people by refusing to protect them and uphold the law.

Currently I am being terrorised by police yet again for my LEGAL and completely justified protests about not receiving the PROFESSIONAL mental health care I am entitled to from ACC (after winning two reviews in 2010 & 2011). ACC review decisions are legally binding, it is illegal to not reinstate my care from 2009 and yet they do it and use impairments related to my disorder to continue the psychological abuse. They do this and I beg you to help and protect me from this gross violation of my rights and you do absolutely nothing – you bring out propaganda saying they should treat me better.

Police violently assault me and threaten me with worse violence if I continue to protest – I am assuming worse violence means what happened to Louise Nicholas and I know for a fact includes psychological abuse using the justice system. I stopped sending you my complaints of serious violations of my rights, which puts my life at risk on a regular basis – you have done absolutely nothing to help me – in fact you participate in using police to terrorise me further – as does the Ombudsman.

Today I sit here writing this terrified at what lengths, neo-liberal elements in police are prepared to go to in order to drive me to suicide, self-harm and more.

I don’t know how to begin because of the extremely life-threatening disorder I now have after years of medical & criminal neglect I have COMPOUNDING Complex PTSD. So bringing up all the traumas causes me significant suffering and torment, makes me highly suicidal and there is nowhere I can turn for help. I was denied professional health care in December after an assessment by a CCDHB psychologist and psychiatrist. I was dumped onto a social worker who caused me significant harm after only a few weeks because he had no concept of seriousness of my impairments (even though I told him).

I currently have no doctor, I am in constant physical pain with my kidneys, hips & ankle, I have another skin cancer but I won’t be able to have this one addressed because I am too terrified to interact with health providers now, after years of discrimination. The very people who supposed to help me are instrumental in discriminating against and persecuting me.

PLEASE NOTE: I am in intelligent person and writer I have an Oxford Dictionary I bought when studying law at Victoria immediately prior to the rape, I know the meaning of persecution and I am using it correctly in this instance. I DO NOT HAVE A MENTAL HEALTH ISSUE that involves paranoia and delusions of persecution, which is how I am treated by your agency and every other I beg for health care and justice from.

So 2 years ago I attempted to attend the court case by Tony Ellis of 3 mentally ill men for torture. I had already tried to take a case of torture myself against ACC and failed at court – I have proof of this. I had already begged your office and attorney-general to allow me to take a case and you both refused to acknowledge what was happening to me. I have been unable to get a lawyer to protect me and my rights in 15 years. I have a letter from my previous criminal lawyer that advises I have serious unmet legal needs. I can provide that if required – as I know you don’t believe anything I say.

Before attending the Tony Ellis trial I phoned High Court security and told them I would be protesting outside and attending court but would not be doing anything but watching – so I could learn how Mr Ellis presented the case so I could do one myself – as I couldn’t get a lawyer, was desperate to return to work and didn’t want to die of my disorder (which is highly dangerous according to all international evidence).

As I went into the court I was confronted by security and told I was not allowed to go, I became very upset as I had done everything required of me, I needed to know this information or I couldn’t get justice I desperately needed. I continued to walk into the court and was violently assaulted by security, I was crying and deeply upset. I had never been assaulted by security before in all my years of being arrested and protesting – I have video footage of some of what happened. When police arrived I was curled up in a ball on the floor against the wall, with a sign in front of me, distraught and traumatised, I have photos of the sign & me looking up at 6 men towering over me. Police arrested me and were very nice, I never resist arrest. I made a formal complaint of assault against High Court security, a complaint that was handled by Sgt Q Hoera, he interviewed me but did nothing about what happened. Even though I know the law, I know what security are allowed to do and they overstepped their authority and the law.

Around this time I was extremely unwell, still begging ACC to reinstate my care from 2009, still being ignored and impairments related to my disability being used against me. I had made multiple complaints to police under Sections 150A 151 155 157 of the Crimes Act, but was ignored. I was phoning ACC remote claims unit – which I had been dumped on because I was angry at being denied professional health care I am legally entitled to after winning 2 reviews – in an extremely unwell and psychotic state screaming at them to return my care.

When I asked for a copy of the recorded phone calls on their answerphone (remote claims NEVER answer the phone it is only an answerphone) under the Privacy Act I was told they did not keep copies of them and my request was denied. Around six weeks later police came to my home and told me they were going to charge me with misuse of a telephone for making the calls, I was overwhelmed with grief and distraught at this gross injustice.   I spent 3 months being dragged through court only to have charges dropped at the last minute.  ACC could only do this by providing a record of the answerphone messages.

Six weeks after the charges were dropped I had police come to my home again (I am terrified of police at my home after years of visits, many of which were extremely traumatising – I have nightmares about police coming to my home now). They told me they were charging me with misuse of a telephone yet again, for phoning ACC really unwell and screaming for help. I was horrified, I have serious RECOGNISED BY A PSYCHIATRIST communication issues when triggered and I couldn’t communicate with police at the time.

I composed myself and went to Carterton police station to find out what was going on -why where they doing this to me again? I was met with insults, degradation and appalling discrimination by the two officers Sgt Q Hoera and Constable Alan French. For 10 mins I was treated like this, trying to defend myself and tell them they were wrong, mental health and ACC were liars I was begging for care – they were saying lots of people had tried to help me and I didn’t want it – that is not true.

I became so angry, I didn’t swear (go tourettes) like I can do (which is a recognised impairment related to my disability) I went back to my car, got out a chalk pen, went back to the police station and drew a swastika & words corrupt on the window in front of them. That was to represent the appalling violation of my human rights – human rights I had as a result of the United Nations recognising how the NAZIs rose to power and putting laws in place to stop this happening again.

I was violently assaulted by these two officers – for my NON-VIOLENT PROTEST. I was subjected to hours of insults and discrimination, when I tried to defend myself verbally they became more abusive and threatened I WOULD SEE HOW BAD POLICE COULD BE IF I KEPT IT UP.   Threats I take extremely seriously considering what happened to Louise Nicholas for many years. I have also realised police are using psychological abuse – which is referred to as Gaslighting – to intimidate and drive my suicidal behaviour even more – they want me to commit suicide.

I want to be sick and tears are rolling down my face as I write this, I will have to self-harm to cope once it is finished.

After I was released I went home to NO SUPPORT and couldn’t tell friends and family either I was so traumatised. I emailed Mike Sutton of Masterton police and told him what had happened, I made a formal complaint to him and the IPCA, I was ignored. A few days later I woke up very very unwell and highly suicidal, covered in bruises, I went to local hospital A & E. When I got there I was very distraught the nurse asked me who had hurt me, I didn’t want to tell her, she had been nice up to that point. Once I said it was police her entire demeanour changed, she left me alone – which was extremely inappropriate in the circumstances. She then put me in another cubicle, left me on my own so terrorised I was rocking backwards and forwards on the bed. By the time a doctor came to see me I was curled up in a ball in the corner of the room rocking, banging my back against the wall to try and calm myself.

The doctor was very nice, he seemed to understand where the nurse was horrible. They recorded the bruising on my hands, my arm and down left side of my leg. I left and went home to no support.

That medical account was given as evidence during the court case for graffiti and wilful trespass I was being charged under – that the violent assault by police was being decided under.  Q Hoera and Alan French told the judge I was pushed up against the wall, when I was thrown onto the ground, which is why I had bruises on side of my left leg.

Nobody told me until the case went to court almost 18 months since the protests and assault that it would be dealt with during court proceedings for my protesting – about police being used by ACC to charge me with misuse of a telephone for screaming for help I am entitled to and desperately needed. I had received the CCTV footage of me being processed by police after the assault – it proves what they had done to me – it was never used in court. Neither was extensive other evidence as to why I was protesting. My lawyer at the time was a public defender with no experience in human rights, bill of rights or what was happening to me.

The lawyer demanded I take out my statement about what was happening to me.

I was acquitted of several other charges for protesting (as I have been multiple times before) but was charged with graffiti for the chalk pen swastika. The judge also made a judgement about the assault saying the officers were justified and not believing anything about the threats or the extent of violence – which I know was illegal. I have been arrested many times, police in Wellington HAVE NEVER treated me so violently. There is a culture of police violence against women in Wairarapa that is not being addressed and is getting worse – I have spoken to several other people now who have witnessed or experienced unnecessary violence towards women here.

I was extremely upset about yet another gross violation of my rights and justice. I became even more unwell and a series of events related to my currently UNSAFE UNSTABLE living situation caused me even further distress (these included a terrifying situation with a mentally ill man on a bracelet in community who had just got out of prison and wanted to live with me because I desperately needed a flatmate.) Which is another story and violation of my human and disability rights that you are currently ignoring.

To cope with what police had done, as I was becoming even more unwell, if that is possible – I went to Masterton police station two weeks ago (30 Jan) and threw red paint over the large white ribbon banner in the foyer. I left, chalked a swastika on the building then headed for Lower Hutt court where I chalked a comment about the very old judge who made the decision and a swastika. I then went to Wellington police station and handed myself in to police there, as I trusted them. They were very nice but made me talk about the police assault which was very upsetting, it was obvious they were uncomfortable with what Wairarapa police had done and the entire situation I was in.

I was given a bail notice to appear on 6th February and conditions that I wasn’t to go within 1 metre of a Wairarapa police station and was to stay every night at my current address. On 1 February a police officer came to my home (which police know I am terrified of), he was very nice and respectful, he told me the 6 Feb date was done in error and could I sign a new Notice of Police Bail that required me to attend court on Monday 5 February. I was told failure to appear would result in my arrest and the notice advises I may be punished by imprisonment of up to 3 months if I did not attend.

I was nervous about the court, as I have spent the past 18 months being dragged through court, I have to get mentally prepared to go, I get dressed up. I am very poor at the moment because I havn’t had a flatmate for past 3 months and had to drive to Masterton with my petrol light flashing – and stressing about that.

When I got there I went inside to tell security to call me when my name came up as I was going to wait outside – and had my guitar so I could sing my songs, which helps me feel less stressed.   I have been escorted from court several times for singing and getting upset inside the court. Court staff know it is better for me to be outside waiting, I don’t feel so trapped (the need to be outside is related to the rape and heightened fight flight and freeze response/impairment I now have). While I was outside singing at around 9am – I was at court at 8.30am as required by the notice.

I also chalked “STOP police violence towards disabled women” on the court fence, I have chalked in this way many times before and not been arrested for it, I know it is within my rights to do this considering the extent of persecution and human rights violations I have been subjected to over several years.

NOTE: I have made a formal complaint to about Judge PJ Butler over his decision and I am attempting to appeal the conviction for graffiti – or more accurately the POLICE ASSAULT decision. But I have been very unwell and still cannot get a lawyer so trying to do it myself.

Police came along outside court and handed me a summons to appear in court on 5 March. Told me I wouldn’t be going to court today. I was very confused, I needed to see the judge to plead and ask for a psych assessment regarding my mental health and motivation behind the blood protest. The WHITE RIBBON sign I threw red poster pain on said to SPEAK OUT ABOUT VIOLENCE TOWARDS WOMEN. I had spoken out and been victimised even more. I know how long court takes, I wanted to make sure things were done as quickly as possible and getting the judge to order an assessment with Justin Barry-Walsh (who I trust and has assessed me for court proceedings previously) would speed things up. Also I had to get a lawyer.

Police left and I went into the court to see the judge. The security guard was very odd, he told me I wasn’t on the court list and I wasn’t allowed in the court, to see a judge or the registrar. I became upset and was then told I was trespassed. I know every person has a right under Magna Carta to see a judge if they need to. I was told there was only a registrar and no judge that day – even though the police officer who came to my home said I would be see a judge. I was prepared to see the registrar but they refused to let me. A woman who works at the court came out from a room looking frightened, she said there was only a registrar, she knew something bad was happening to me I am sure.

I left the court and headed back to my car not far away, as I was three police officers came around the corner, the two who had given me the summons and another. There was one shorter police officer and two very tall ones – it was very intimidating. I have NEVER resisted arrest police know that, I have had situations in Wellington where one officer was sent to arrest me. Once I am told I am under arrest I comply with everything police say, unless it violates my rights.

I was very distressed at being required to be in court or I could spend time in jail, but told I didn’t need to be there and to come back in a month. I went home with my light still flashing, I was very upset, mostly because the behaviour by police was so blatantly part of the GASLIGHTING form of psychological abuse vulnerable people can be subjected to by people in positions of power over them, either abusive partners or abusive organisations like police. This is a well documented and accepted form of abuse in power relationships. This is why we have a Human Rights Act and supposed to be protected from this form of violence by those in positions of power.

As Tuesday was a holiday on Wednesday I headed for Wellington early to see a judge or the registrar so I could have my court case moved to Wellington as it was obvious to me I was never going to get justice at the Masterton Court and the police station is behind the court house. I am terrified of Wairarapa police after years of discrimination and harm that you and other organisations suppose to protect me ignore.

I knew I had to see a judge but there were none available at Wellington District Court which I found strange, given it was a city court. I asked to see the registrar to explain what had happened and get the court proceedings moved. I talked to a Chinese man who was difficult to understand because of his accent, he was horrible, when I started to cry recounting what was going on he became insulting and patronising, when I told him it was police who were harming me he got worse. Because I was upset security were called to stand behind me and intimidate me – I was sodomised by the rapist from behind I get nervous when men stand behind me.

I then spoke to another person in the registrar’s office at Wellington District Court, all the woman said was for me to calm down – ie not cry and be completely distraught. She didn’t help me get to see the registrar to get court changed and arrange a psych report (as has been done before when I have gone through court for protesting about not receiving mental health care I am entitled to by law). Then she told security to remove me without helping me. A large woman with blond hair was by this stage standing behind her with a look of complete contempt on her face – a manager perhaps.

I left with security, but asked to see a lawyer on the 2nd floor, which I was allowed to do. This lawyer – who I will get the name of soon – listened to what was happening for just a short time, took my two Bail notices and summons off me, told me they were police documents and nothing to do with the court and I should leave. I was shocked, this wasn’t right advice and I knew that, I left with security. The lawyer told me if I wanted the court venue changed it was police I had to ask. I was scared to go to them but I had no choice.

I then went to Wellington police station as the lawyer told me and explained the situation. They told me I could not get court venue changed unless I changed my plea to guilty. But I hadn’t been able to plead because they wouldn’t let me in the court (even if I was going to plead not guilty I still hadn’t told the court that). The police officer was very nice, I was very very upset, he knew what was happening to me was wrong. He ended up agreeing it was a judge or registrar that would need to change the court venue – as I was now terrified of being in Masterton knowing what they were capable of. I kept saying I was sorry to him, for being so upset and that I had to complain about what police in Wairarapa were doing to me.

I left the police station and headed for the Community Law Centre where I sat waiting for 2 hours, crying mostly. I saw two women and told them my story, they said I really needed a lawyer and listed three on the form they gave me – I was distraught, begged them to find me a lawyer as when I ever tried I was rejected – they refused saying they weren’t allowed. I have since phoned those three lawyers one of them was not a criminal lawyer and couldn’t do it – the other two weren’t taking on new clients. I then remembered why I stopped going to Community Law Centre (I had been there about 5 times in past 14 years) because they always told me I needed a lawyer, referred me to people who were too busy or refused to help me because it wasn’t their area of expertise. This is a violation of my Magna Carta rights, and I know it.

Because I am now terrified of Wairarapa police and security at Masterton Court house I know I won’t be able to attend the summons on 5 March – I have no mental health support and impairments related to my disorder will stop me from going – I become phobic and unable to move when I am very unwell. I would then break the law and then police will come to my home and violently arrest me – I don’t want that, but I can’t go to Masterton court, I know I can’t. This is an impairment related to my disability and must be accommodated if possible under Human Rights and Bill of Rights laws.

When I spoke to Community Law lawyers they told me I was right in applying to the registrar in Wellington, they suggested the reason court staff were so insulting is they don’t like dealing with lay-people. If a lawyer was representing me they would have treated them with respect at the request to shift venues and most likely agreed, considering the proof of years of victimisation and police violence.

I desperately need a lawyer but there are none, I can’t appear in court in Masterton because of impairments related to my disorder, God please help me – what do I do? I have phoned dozens of lawyers, every rejection causes me to self-harm and is extremely harmful and degrading.

I contact politicians and senior police who supposed to take complaints of harm seriously – they refuse to do anything. I am a Civil Society Actor as defined by the United Nations it is illegal to use processes in a punitive way, which is exactly what is happening to me. I have contacted the United Nations, they told me you would help me and protect me, but you never have.

GOD PLEASE HELP ME.

Yours sincerely

JR

Civil Society Actor

HUMAN SEWAGE